An elevator speech for sexual assault

Last night I had an opportunity to hang out with one of our clients. While we were talking she said, “Ms. Lindsey, one of the boys in my class asked, ‘Is you a virgin.'” I looked at him and said, “is you a virgin, because mine ain’t none of your business.” I was so proud of her because 2 months ago she was admitting to not knowing how to say no.

I instantly thought of this post I had read the day before. One of my biggest desires is that women learn to have their voice, but some circumstances come out of nowhere and are completely unexpected. Unfortunately, we can’t control the people around us, but we can attempt to be prepared.

Tip of My Tongue

A few weekends ago, I was out with a group of friends. We were chatting in a circle, in a busy public place, when one of them got a funny look. Creasing his brow, he announced, “I think that man tried to touch my asshole.” We all stared after the couple that had just walked by, a middle-aged man and woman holding hands. My friend said again, “Yeah, no way that was accidental. He just tried his damned best to stick his finger in my butt.”

This was new to me. I have never been present when a man was sexually assaulted. None of us knew how to respond. My friend was justly stunned, and the rest of us weren’t sure if we should chase the stranger down, or yell after him, or just move on. In the end – no surprises here – we made some weak jokes…

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